I have also had many years of misery. The best thing I did was listen to my doctor. I too didn't want to take drugs, and I am a runner. I was blaming others all along for my misery. In my case my Dad who thought he was doing a good job was a great cause of my 'fall' as a teenager. Instead of picking me up after the fall, he allowed me to be labelled by the family because he 'couldn't take it anymore'. I lived with my aunt, who then passed me on to my Grandparents, and then a husband. I built myself up slowly with education, fitness, and beautiful friends. I still feel that all the people around me that saw 'the great fall' make me go back to those days. You have to accept the past and force yourself to get up and start a new life. I take antidepressants now as a result of the greatest fall I could've experienced, the death of my teenaged nephew to cancer. I tried to go off them this week, and found the 'reality' of life again. I started getting flu-like symptoms and took a pill to begin tapering off slowly. You have to look at WHAT IS REALLY a problem in your life. My nephew's death was the WORST thing that ever happened to me and made all other past situations seem insignificant parts of my life that lead up to the BIG FALL. You have to ask yourself, "are my problems really that bad?"
If they're not, maybe you should try antidepressants. I take effexor RX, the lowest dose of 37.5mgs/day, my sister, the mother of the young man who died, takes double the dose to function outside IN THE REAL WORLD.