Hi guys, I'm an avid reader here, on every day for atleast an hour. I wanted to gather some opinions about my current situation.
To cut it short, I've been struggling with allergies to virtually anything and everything for my entire life. For a long time I thought it was candida and if it was, my diet and cleansing has long eliminated it. As well I've thoroughly cleansed parasites, I have a zapper, I use Miracle-Mineral-Supplement
, Pulsar, Silver Generator etc etc. I'm now doing Liver Flushing
and loving it.
To get to my point, about two years ago I was at the gym when I suddenly noticed that I would run out of breath very quickly and would have difficultly keeping up my routine without getting lightheaded and being unable to continue.
Jump 1 year later in June/07 and I throw a disc out in my neck while exercising. I completely herniate the disc and have excruciating pain that radiates down my right arm and keeps my up at night in sweats of pain. I refuse to take any drug based pain killers, instead I opt for natural pain relief in wobenzym, herbs, chiropractic, massage, osteopathic etc.
Dec/07 rolls around and my breathing becomes very shallow, I can barely speak to people without running out of breath, this in essence makes my job a nightmare as I'm a manager in a healthfood store and I need to talk to people all day.
Mid December I'm driving on the highway and my breathing runs so shallow that my entire body goes cold I lose feeling in my feet and hands, I go into what I can only describe as a panic attack. Looking back and learning much more I now know it was a form of shock as my blood pressure dropped to an abnormal level.
Since the incident in december I'm routinely out of breath and just trying to get by.
I went in to see some doctors about this issue recently and the response from both of them was that I was suffering from Anxiety and that I should consider leaving my job.
I still feel there is some other cause at hand but I am now forced to accept that my job probably is the cause.
NOW THE REAL REASON and PROBLEM: My major compounding issue I didn't mention is that although I am a manager of sorts at the store I work at. The store owner I work for is still the real manager and he is a complete alpha-AAA+++ personality type, control freak with an ego to boot. He routinely yells at people for virtually nothing more than being "stressed" as he feels justified in his actions because of this.
Our store is the #1 ranked health store in our canadian chain, much of the success is due to his power/pressure sales tactics (Note: pressure tactics which I have avoided and never liked since day #1). My boss ALSO has the reputation of being the #1 most notorious meanest store owner in the entire CANADIAN HEALTH INDUSTRY! Read that again if you missed it. I am not exaggerating in the slightest. He is one of the most if not the most negative person I've ever met, most verbally abusive and hot termpered I've ever witnessed both personally and to others.
Now I have worked "under" him in many ways for the past 3.5 years. I have been repeatedly verbally abused for no real reason endless amounts of times. I developed an attitude when I began the job that if I meditated and kept healthy happy thoughts that his problems would be his and in no way would his demeanor affect me. I've cracked atleast a few times where he actually moved me to tears. I've thought about quitting non-stop now for about the past 2 years. The problem I have is that he will apologize in most (not all) cases after he flips out, promising bonuses and dinners for the staff and me. I'm a softie for apologies and most times I'll just accept them blindly, lately these apologies just don't hold any water.
I guess what I really need to know is after reading this, and based on my current condition which he by the way believes is all in my head and will hear nothing of. Anyone with experience in dealing with this is HIGHLY desired.
So should I...
1...flat out quit with a letter letting him know how his mistreating me affected me, basically blaming him (And thus losing him as a VERY highly recognized reference on my resume)
2...Quit and try to leave on good terms, doing this asap as my health is falling apart and much or most of the adrenal burnout is a result of my boss.
3...Try to just drop shifts and only work a couple days a week. (Or is working around him at all going to keep my recovery from moving on?)
I'm currently stuck deciding between options 2+3. As I would still need an income, although the way I'm feeling it's unlikely I can work very often anyway.
By the way I'm young 26, a nutritionist in the making, and a personal trainer. My recent health has completely turned my life upside down and I just want to get through this so I can continue on a path of helping others instead of barely being able to help myself. This forum is incredible and the information here never ceases to amaze me.